More children please

I sometimes wonder how many children was I supposed to have. When Bjorn and I first got married I wanted 4 children, he wanted 2 or 3. I soon became pregnant with Torin realizing that pregnancy was not my cup of tea. Some women love it, me on the other hand not so much. I seriously thought that was the only child that I was going to have as I just didn't want to go through pregnancy again. Obviously, I changed my mind as we now have 3 but making the decision to have 3 was kind of a big one. It's one that sometimes in the midst of craziness of 3 boys I wonder what God was thinking ;) All kidding aside of course. We are content with 3 and feel that we have our hands more than full, however, Torin has really been inquiring about having more siblings. He's always been great with babies. I remember a friend of mine having twins and bringing Torin with me to "help" out. Now mind you he was only 20 months himself. But he did help in holding the bottle and feeding one of the babies when it was feeding time. When Vaughn was born he was wonderful with him. They have their moments now BUT Torin still has a very sweet spot in his heart for Vaughn. Sometimes so amazing that it literally takes Bjorn and I back a step or two. When Berc was born Torin stepped up his act that much more and is always doing things to help Berc out. He loves that little boy more than when could understand. As we were casually strolling along in the store the other day Torin says, "Mom I think that we need to pick up 2 more kids for our family." It took me back as his statement made it sound as if we could head down to aisle #4 and pick out a few kids to bring home with us :) But it has made me think more. Were we supposed to have more children. Things have been done to ensure that we do not have any more children but I got to thinking a little more....does it matter if they are biological? Having siblings that are adopted there has always been apart of me that has wanted to adopt. Now, I don't EVER think of my brother or sister as adopted. I've known them my entire life and they are my brother and sister. Our blood and genes may not come from the same people but our memeories and love that has grown throughout the years are the same. I remember the way that my brother loved me as a little kid and I don't see any difference between that and how Torin loves Bercan. As Bjorn reads this I'm sure that he will have some heart burn as this is the topic of mind for me but at the end of the day our lives are enriched by our children. Whether it's been a good day or a day that has challenged us to grow in ways that maybe we didn't want to grow its the plan that God has laid out for us.

Christmas Eve

Probably the best thing about Christmas Eve was that it was low key. It was the five of us and Auntie Louise, Uncle Perry and course Sadie and Gus. We had dinner in and it was great! The boys loved just hanging out with their Aunt and Uncle and the puppies. Being the Auntie and Uncle of course they got them a few presents. They went with the seahorse theme. Torin got this awesome dragon seahorse, Vaughn one that had White Bear Lake colors and Berc's was a little seahorse cute just like him.

We ended the night off with a fire, requested by the boys of their Uncle that was prompted by their Aunt :) It was pretty cute as Uncle Perry just couldn't say no to the boys. Once Berc was laid down the boys just hung out by the fire warming themselves and watching the glow of the embers. When the boys were tucked away us adults talked about, oh anything and everything. It was a peaceful, quiet evening that will be cherished with memories for a lifetime.

Here are a few pictures of the evening...

Before dinner the boys were hanging out with

Auntie Lousie at the computer checking out

really important things :)

A picture of the boys and Sadie before dinner. The boys loved hanging out with
the puppies. And the puppies really loved them! Berc was like a new little chew toy
they both got used to each other in the few days that we were there.

Berc with his little seahorse. It was pretty cute to see him
walk around with the little guy. Just hugging and kissing it.

Torin and his dragon seahorse. I have to say that it was
a pretty cool stuffed animal. The best thing is that we actually
got to see live ones when we went to the aquarium.

Loss

Torin has a good friend who just lost his Grandpa and has been feeling pretty down about it. So we decided to try and cheer this friend up that we would invite him for a sleep over. Torin of course was pumped up about this and so was his friend.

When Torin I were talking about his friend he shared with me that Jacob had said that he had cried about loosing his Grandpa a few times. Torin said that he felt bad for him. I started to explain that loss, even though it is part of God's plan, that it is hard to accept and live with. Now let me explain that this little boy's Grandpa was outstanding and an exception to most Grandparents. He lived his life around his grandchildren. He went to every practice and every game. At the wake we said that Jim probably went to more games and practices then we did as parents as we would often trade off due to work or other obligations. Torin knew this and was sure to point out that Jacob's grandpa wasn't just like that for hockey but also baseball. These kids notice this sort of thing.

I explained to Torin that when someone is around all the time like that and then suddenly isn't it's hard to accept and it can make people feel sad and alone. It was this comment that Torin became REALLY sad and said "If Dad died I just don't know what I would do Mom." I could tell by his voice that he was on the verge of crying. I told him that Daddy had no plans of dying any time soon and that he takes good care of himself so he was going to be around for a long time. My words were able to soothe his fears but it started to make cherish that we did have our Daddy around.

It really tied into a conversation that I had recently with my brother. As he lost our Dad when he was 6 years old. His son is almost 6 and he has been thinking more about that his son is almost at the age he was when he lost our Dad. It's something that I have never thought about it, as our Dad passed when my Mom was still pregnant with me. It's a different sortof loss between my brother and I. But seeing how just the thought of it impacted Torin moved a piece of me that hasn't been moved before.

Reflecting on it now makes me want to spend each day cherishing the loved ones that we have with us now. As we never know when suddenly it will be taken away from us.

Imagination

Of course all small children have imaginations. Some have imaginary friends while others will just make things up. Torin has come up with a doozy or two in his time and even I remember a few that I tried to pull over on my parents but our Vaughn has topped any imagination that I have ever known or heard of.

His imagination revolves around his stuffed monkey who's name is appropriately named "Monkey". Monkey and his family have all sorts of adventures some are pretty plain but others involve things that you couldn't imagine if you tried :)

It's pretty much a every day basis that Vaughn will come up with what we have termed "a monkey story". Torin is actually pretty good about, instead of calling his bluff on it, he'll ask questions to get more details of the story which, trust me, Vaughn is more than willing to elaborate and share.

It's gotten to the point that we have created a facebook page for Monkey. The real purpose of this was to be able to collect all the "stories" of monkey. The things that Vaughn will come with are just so funny sometimes while others are just run of the mill "try to out do" the story you just heard, to some of the most off the wall things that you really just don't know what to do with them...So if you are interested in following monkey feel free to check him out at http://www.facebook.com/pages/Monkey/199496040090413...

Until then enjoy the monkey quotes and pictures.